The gods of Whymsia come in two varieties: the Lords of Creation, and the Lesser Gods.
The Lords of CreationEdit
The Lords of Creation are the five wellsprings from which the world...well, springs. Each rules over one of the five Planes of Alignment, and it is the dynamic interactions between their forces that bring about all the rest of creation. Though people respect the Five Lords, few truly worship them; the Lords are far beyond needing the faith of mere mortals to help them out.
- Benedicta – Lady of Good, Incarnate of the Saccharine. Benedicta rules over the plane of Sacchrina. She can most often be found in the Woods of Celestial Harmony where all creatures love each other and show love and kindness to all beings. (If you walk through, you can hear the flowers occasionally burst into song while the cute wildlife dances.)
- Bureaucron – Lord of Law, Automaton of Administration. Bureaucron is a sexless, ageless, faceless automaton patiently overseeing the gears of Administrata to keep Creation running. Some scholars suspect that Bureaucron actually is Administrata, instead of merely its caretaker.
- Destructomaximus – Lord of Evil, Ruler of Nastiness, Incarnation of All That is Wrong in the World. D.M., as he prefers to be known (“Max” to his--very few--friends), is the ultimate avatar of pure Evil. He behaves very much like a mob boss (and dresses the part, too), lording over his Endless Night nightclub. Rumor has it he hosts a weekly poker game for the lesser gods, and there is great theological debate about which of them attend.
- Ennui – Lord of Neutrality, lord of Apathy and Boredom. He sits forever in his celestial recliner and engages in the Great Pontifications. He has spent the past four hundred years contemplating the growth of the Endless Field (where the grass grows but an inch every centuries), and sages think he’s about due to switch to watching the paint peel from the Infinite Wall or dust fleck from the Boundless Rock. It is said that Ennui cares for nothing, and thus nothing can harm him. No one has ever managed to get his attention to see if this is correct.
- Harpo – Lord of Chaos, Magnate of the Unchanging, Holder of the Purple Fish. No one’s really sure what Harpo's schtick is, because he keeps changing it. His plane of Locura is an ever-changing morass of chaotic stuff, and Harpo fits it perfectly. He never speaks, but you do get statements from him in the form of bicycle horns, mime, rains of frogs, or being turned into a purple wumpus.
The Lesser GodsEdit
The Lesser Gods refers to what most people actually think of when they refer to gods: powerful beings fueled by the worship of mortals and granting powers to their devoted followers. (And, incidentally, vulnerable to things like lack of worship or epic-level adventurers, though the clergy doesn't usually mention that.) There are between several hundred and several thousand of these gods, although most of them are not widely known in the world. The divisions below refer to where they're usually worshipped, not where they actually live. (That's generally Solaris.)
Note: Players are actively encouraged to come up with their own gods to worship. The only guideline is that, being a comedy campaign, each of the gods has three "normal" domains and one odd one. Though the odd ones exist mostly for flavor, if a cleric or someone actually chooses one, we can work out the mechanics as needed.
- Ecsraxius - Ecsraxius is the god of evil and destruction. He delights in wanton carnage and self-serving chaos, and is pretty much the incarnations of all that is Evil, just not as much as Destructomaximus. (For which Ecsraxius is forever jealous). Ecsraxius does have one soft spot, however: puppies. He loves puppies, and anyone who harms one in his presence can expect swift retribution from the Lord of Wanton Death. His temple is guarded by heckhounds, which are the cutest little vehicles of destruction you’ll ever see. His holy symbol is a skull dripping blood and tears of the innocent while the terrified legions look on upon all that they love going up in flames and the avatars of death visit retribution upon the righteous and bring pain to all who would defy their will. (Full holy symbols require at least a tower shield to portray all this. Most people shorten it to a crying skull, which just makes him seem emo.)
- Domains: Death, Destruction, Evil, Puppies
- The Three Sisters - This trio of goddesses are widely respected in Greater Mundania, though there is a lot of rivalry between their clergy.
- Destiny guides the life of heroes and adventurers. She is always blind and often drunk, capricious, and possibly insane. Of all the games the gods play, her favorite is pin-the-tail-on-the-unsuspecting-hero. Her holy symbol is a pair of dice strung together. Hopeful adventurers will often tie them to their saddle pommels in the hopes of gaining her favor. Experienced adventurers generally try to stay as far away from her influence as possible.
- Domains: Chaos, Glory, Luck, Drunkenness
- Rarasisk Umbaa
• • The Three Sisters o Destiny o Rarasisk Umbaa (usually abbreviated to Rarasisk) is the god(dess) of the sun, light, and cheerleaders. (Say the name out loud). She is perky to the point of annoying, but is always willing to lend a helping hand. Her holy symbol is a sun with a smiley face on it. Domains: Community, Nobility, Sun, Sporting Events o Estradiol is a rabidly feminist/feminazi goddess whose holy symbol is the female symbol. Only women may join her order, participate in services, etc. Men are “brute necessities” only useful for reproduction (and some followers get around that with rings of short-term sex-change). She’s probably one of the unsavory goddesses, and even has a rumored corps of “Black ops” lesbian stripper ninjas. (And no matter how many men want them to show up, they always regret it when they do, often by joining the church’s ranks of servant eunuchs) Domains: Liberation, Protection, Strength, Feminism • Dread Lord Yg’ygragax, who sits at the center of the multiverse, arms outstretched and causing chaos and destruction in his wake. Yg’ygragax is supposedly the first god, whose blind bagpiping brought the other gods into existence. (They left pretty quickly.) None dare to tread upon his domain, for even the mere sight of his dread visage can drive men mad (no save). His holy symbol is a black icosahedron. Domains: Chaos, Luck, Madness, Snack Foods • There’s a pair of half-sibling gods who are the gods of Coolness and Awesomeness. (The difference being that coolness is usually more subdued than awesomeness.) Coolness’ clerics often sport sunglasses of charisma. Awesomeness grants a domain ability that’s basically stunting (once per encounter; +1 to +2 for a normal stunt, but up to +5 if it makes the other players stare at you slack-jawed at your sheer awesomeness.)